Show up to prayer Is 60:1-6; Ps 72:1-2, 7-8, 10-11, 12-13; Eph 3:2-3a, 5-6; Mt 2:1-12 I have always been drawn to meditative forms of prayer. I prayed the rosary every night when I was going through the Rite of Christian Initiation program in my early 20s. And when I discovered the Angelus prayer, I began to pray it in the morning, afternoon and evening. I would also attend eucharistic adoration at my local parish as often as I could. I would bring various items with me to adoration to help me channel my prayer. I brought spiritual books, journals, rosaries or other devotionals. No matter what, I would bring something that I could “do.” I was always looking for some way for prayer to occupy my mind rather than allow it to quiet my mind so I could hear God. I continued to explore the many forms of meditative prayer our tradition offers. Over time, I grew tired of these prayers. I lost that feeling of connectedness to God that I used to have — that feeling of knowing that God is there and listening. I kept trying to do something to get that feeling back. Eventually, it seemed that there was nothing I could do. So, I stopped trying. Even though I stopped trying to reach God, God did not stop trying to reach me. At times I would feel a sudden and strong urge to pray. But I would either ignore it or put it off until I did not feel it anymore. This tug-of-war with the Holy Spirit continued for a few years until my friend recommended me to a spiritual director. The spiritual director helped me to understand that I did not grow tired of prayer because God was not meeting me there anymore. I grew tired of it because it was time to engage with God in prayer in a different way. It was time to step aside and practice listening to God rather than controlling every aspect of my prayer session. Instead of choosing to grow in my prayer life, I had given up on it because I could not control it anymore. Perhaps if I had remained persistent in prayer, and maintained openness to hearing God, I would have realized that all I needed to do to pray was to show up consistently and let God guide me. I wonder if the Magi already mastered this skill of prayer by the time they saw the star in the sky. They did not try to control the message they received from God. They did not do anything special to bring it about. We are only told that they saw Jesus’ star and journeyed from the East to find him. This taps into an ancient belief that the appearance of a new star signified the birth of a new ruler. But how did the Magi know who this new ruler was? And where to find him? Herod had to research the question (Mt 2:4) to figure out what the Magi seemed to understand instinctively. They simply saw the star and let it guide them to the infant Jesus. Growing in prayer allows one to hear God better and trust that God will guide you if you let him. We may not always feel “in the mood” to pray. Our desire to pray will come and go, as will our own awareness of God’s presence with us. But God is consistently at our side whether we feel it or not. And it is remaining persistent in our prayer lives that helps us to remember God’s presence in our lives and keeps us open to seeing it. There are many ways to pray, but there is nothing special we really need to do to pray. Praying is about listening and giving up control to God. God is always waiting for us to come to him. All we need to do, then, is show up — and show up consistently.